ANYTHING Arnold Schwarzenegger can do, Vin Diesel can do it better.
That seems to be the message of The Pacifier, a fast-paced family comedy cut from the same cloth as the preposterous Kindergarten Cop.
Not content with bulking up as America's newest muscle-bound action hero (Pitch Black, The Fast And The Furious, xXx), Diesel tries to show us a softer side in this light-hearted romp.
It's clear from the offset that comedy is not his strong point (most of the big laughs are at his expense).
But he exudes a certain charm as a gung-ho hero who meets his match in a gang of mischievous moppets... and a meddlesome mallard duck called Gary which thinks it's a guard dog.
Elite Navy SEAL operative Shane Wolfe (Diesel) is devastated when top government scientist Howard Plummer (Tate Donovan) is assassinated during a botched rescue mission.
Plummer's death is a bitter blow - he was working on a top secret encryption software program called Ghost, which could prove vital to maintaining US security.
If the program were to fall into enemy clutches, the repercussions would be disastrous.
Navy intelligence hopes that the secret to Plummer's work lies in his safety deposit box, located in a Geneva bank.
So while Plummer's wife Julie (Faith Ford) heads for Switzerland under the escort of Captain Bill Fawcett (Chris Potter), Shane accepts the most perilous assignment of his career: to baby-sit the dead man's five wayward children.
Swapping his arsenal of hi-tech guns and wetsuits for lunchboxes and bedtime stories, Shane struggles to maintain control of sassy teen rebel Zoe, sullen 14-year-old Seth, inquisitive eight-year-old Lulu, three-year-old Peter and baby Tyler.
As Shane mellows into his role as surrogate parent, the Plummer youngsters learn to appreciate his strict codes of discipline.
The Pacifier is a lightweight and mildly entertaining slice of nonsense, welding obvious laughs (Shane's clumsy first attempt to change a nappy) with slick action set pieces.
See it at UCI, Odeon
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